Oh the taste of your poison paradise -- The 2005 Music Finale

Best B-sides/Outtakes Collection: Out-of-State Plates – Fountains of Wayne

Best Cover Song: “Toxic” – Nickel Creek

Best Music Documentary: The Fearless Freaks / No Direction Home (tie)

Best Quote About R.E.M. In an Article Not About R.E.M.: "These bands are filling the void from R.E.M.," opines Spin executive editor Doug Brod. "R.E.M. still make records, but they're not good ones."

Best Release in a Continuing Series of Old Dylan Songs: No Direction Home: The Bootleg Series, Volume 7

Funniest Music-Related Top Ten: Top Ten People Who Should’ve Been Drafted Into the Wu-Tang Clan

Funniest Promise from a Musician: Chris Martin says Coldplay’s lyrics will get better

Most Disappointing Album: Here Come the Choppers – Loudon Wainwright, III (I guess there can only be so many good albums from a Wainwright in one calendar year.)

Music-Related McSweeney's Lists from 2005:

Bruce Springsteen Songs, If the Title More Accurately Reflected the Subject Matter

Discarded Titles for Toni Braxton's 1996 Hit "Unbreak My Heart"

Implausable Claims Made by Vanilla Ice in His 1990 No. 1 Hit "Ice Ice Baby"

Kanye West's Lyric "The Way School Need Teachers / The Way Kathie Lee Needed Regis / That's the Way I Need Jesus," Adapted for Other Religions

Leonard Cohen's Seven Immutable Laws of Business

New Radiohead Material to be Debuted at a Benefit Show to Protest Privatization of the Postal Sector

Song Titles, Before Editing For Language Efficiency and Clarity

Things This City Was Built On, Besides Rock 'N' Roll

What I Like About You

The lemons grow like tumors, they are tiny suns infused with sour -- Other Albums of Note from 2005

I’m Wide Awake, It’s Morning – Bright Eyes
I couldn’t have been more surprised by this album. I really liked it when it first came out and it has faded some since then. Going back not too long ago I found that some of the songs are still really strong, but not the whole thing.

Humming By the Flowered Vine – Laura Cantrell
I really wish I could have gone to the Laura Cantrell concert with Scott and Mike last year. I think I was coming back from Florida the day of the show. Not everything works out like you want it to. Doing a little bit of self reflection when it comes to my #1 picks for 2004 and 2005, I see that I saw those artists live both years. Coincidence? Hmmmm. Maybe I would have liked this one more if I had made it to the concert. I don’t know. It’s still really good but I’ve liked her other albums better.

The Forgotten Arm – Aimee Mann
I really like Aimee Man and I’ve enjoyed this album the few times I’ve played it. It just sounds too much like her last two albums. Nothing stands out.

The Woods – Sleater-Kinney
I admire this more than I really like it. There have been times when I really dug it and other times when I just turned it off. It’s frustrating because I think it’s a great album. It’s sequenced really well. I know this because in my frustrations I tried to rearrange the tracks to see if it might work out better for me. Oh, well. It’s just not something I think of putting on when I want to enjoy a great album. It hardly makes sense, but there it is.

Devils & Dust – Bruce Springsteen
I like quiet, folk-y Springsteen. The Ghost of Tom Joad was one of my favorite albums back when it was released. This one is good, but not great. I haven’t really wanted to go back and hear it much.

Here Come the ABCs – They Might Be Giants
This is a great kid’s album. I’ve really enjoyed listening to it with Aden. It also wins the award for album I’ve listened to the most from 2005.

Late Registration – Kanye West
It would be impossible for a rap album to make my top 10. Not because I don’t like the genre, but because for an album to be repeatedly listenable, it can’t have stupid segues, skits, and interludes between songs. If you’ve heard those once, that’s enough. Still, this album isn’t on my Top 10 for other reasons as well. There are some really weak songs mixed in with the good ones.

Purloined in Petrograd -- My Favorite Albums of 2005

Now that I’ve got the movie ranking out of my system I will be writing about music this week. I will not be writing novellas about each album like I did last year. (Shatner / Lynn / Wilco / Costello / TMBG / Hitchcock / Wilson) I still agree with everything I wrote last year (surprisingly). Those are the albums that still stand up the most to me. I never put them in any order and only highlighted 7 albums though. Looking over my honorable mentions from 2004, here's the proper 2004 Top Ten: 1. Spooked - Robyn Hithcock / 2. A Ghost is Born - Wilco / 3. Van Lear Rose - Loretta Lynn / 4. The Delivery Man - Elvis Costello & the Imposters / 5. The Spine - They Might Be Giants / 6. In Rock - The Minus 5 / 7. Has Been - William Shatner / 8. A Boot and a Shoe - Sam Phillips / 9. Smile - Brian Wilson / 10. Good News For People Who Love Bad News - Modest Mouse

Now I'm going to put my 2005 Top Ten out there already ranked and with only a few comments. Here it comes on a palanquin:

10. Why Should the Fire Die? - Nickel Creek
Scott says, and I agree with him, that one day Nickel Creek are going to record an absolute, no questions, great album. This one isn't it but the promise is still there. "When In Rome" is their strongest pop single yet and a great opener to the album.

9. Georgia Hard - Robbie Fulks
I've just started listening to this one the past few weeks and it started growing on me quickly. It could move up on the list with more listens.

8. Songs for Silverman - Ben Folds
I didn't care for this one when it first came out. It lacked Ben's humor which is one of his strengths. This album is all pretty songs but not necessarily songs about pretty things. I've finally given in and really like it for what it is and not for what I wanted it to be.

7. Guero - Beck
I thought Sea Change was great, but I was excited to hear a return to more Beck-like Beck. I can do without all the freakin' remixes that are released every other day from this album, but whatchagonnado?

6. Blinking Lights and Other Revelations - eels
A rare double album that really works. "In the Yard, Behind the Church" is one of the best songs of the year.

5. Get Behind Me Satan - The White Stripes
Better than Elephant yet no where near as good as White Blood Cells. Several songs on here are catchy as hell. I haven't got "My Doorbell" out of my head yet and "I'm Lonely (But I Ain't That Lonely Yet)" is in the running for song title of the year.

4. Martha Wainwright - Martha Wainwright
The lilts in her voice and the rhythm of her delivery are enough to make this album captivating. Then you hear the words and then you realize the magnitude of their meaning when you consider her family's history. Wow. Side note: I still say that if you take Loudon, Rufus, Martha, and the McGarrigle's Sisters and put them on tour together and record the whole thing (on-stage and backstage) that it would make for the best reality TV show ever.

3. Twin Cinema - The New Pornographers
We are now into the top 3 or as it turned out, the James-tries-new-stuff section of the list. I usually don't take any band too seriously that gets heaps of praise from all the indie rock geeks because most of these bands that get all the huzzahs end up sounding unoriginal and boring. Well, The New Pornographers make great pop music and no amount of indie rock geek associations should keep anyone from checking them out. I was going to list my favorite tracks from this album but it got too lenghty to be effective. The whole album is one great song after another.

2. Gimme Fiction - Spoon
If you're like me (and for your sake I hope you're not) you go through times with a great album where you listen to nothing but that album. It’s usually about a week or two. You might break it up with other stuff occasionally but you keep going back to that one album over and over again. I’ve had that experience with Gimme Fiction at least 5 different times this year. It was especially strong during our trip to Disneyworld this summer. Which was cool with my brother-in-law who travelled with us, but Amy wasn't that thrilled. Also, there is a rumor floating out there that the track list was accidentally submitted to the record company in reverse order. That's got to be the best crazy music rumor of the year.

1. Picaresque - The Decemberists
I don't know the last time, if ever, I've gone so quickly from first listening to a band to instantly loving them, getting all of their stuff, and seeing them in concert. It was a 5 month span all told which is lightning quick for me. I can't say enough about how great they are and how much I love them. Review of the concert is here. If my enthusiasm for them is any indication, Picaresque is a great introduction to the band.

Bonus Top Ten; here is my friend Jon's:

10. Z - My Morning Jacket
9. Gimmie Fiction - Spoon
8. Chaos & Creation In The Backyard - Paul McCartney
7. Cold Roses - Ryan Adams & The Cardinals
6. Get Behind Me Satan - The White Stripes
5. Late Registration - Kanye West
4. I Am A Bird Now - Antony and the Johnsons
3. Twin Cinema - New Pornographers
2. Why Should The Fire Die? - Nickel Creek
1. Silent Alarm - Bloc Party

Let's get to the good part...

Best of 2000 - 2004

Here's the rest. The earlier genre-specific categories included 2005. This was mainly to include Batman Begins on the Action/Sci-Fi list. This main list does not include any movies from 2005. If it did The Interpreter might make it and Sin City definitely would. I tried to rank them in an order that would reflect their quality, but that's really hard to do. Mainly these are the best made movies that I enjoyed the most in a semi-rigid ranking. There is one made-for-HBO movie on the list (Angels in America). It was just too good to leave off the list.

50. Bamboozled (2000)
49. Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (2002)
48. Hotel Rwanda (2004)
47. Waking Life (2001)
46. Kinsey (2004)
45. Angels in America (2004)
44. Best in Show (2000)
43. Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003) / Kill Bill: Vol. 2 (2004)
42. Holes (2003)
41. Startup.com (2001)
40. Punch Drunk Love (2002)
39. Open Range (2003)
38. 25th Hour (2002)
37. Hedwig and the Angry Inch (2001)
36. Amelie (2001)
35. Shadow of the Vampire (2000)
34. Shattered Glass (2003)
33. Monsters Inc. (2001)
32. Sideways (2004)
31. Before Sunset (2004)
30. The Man Who Wasn’t There (2001)
29. The Cooler (2003)
28. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
27. O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000)
26. Almost Famous (2000)
25. You Can Count on Me (2000)
24. Harry Potter & the Chamber of Secrets (2002) / Harry Potter & the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)
23. Ghost World (2001)
22. Sexy Beast (2001)
21. Chicago (2002)
20. Capturing the Friedmans (2003)
19. Mulholland Dr. (2001)
18. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)
17. Memento (2001)
16. Traffic (2000)
15. Mean Creek (2004)
14. Jesus’ Son (2000)
13. Black Hawk Down (2001)
12. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings (2001)
11. Spirited Away (2002)
10. The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)
9. Y tu mama tambien (2001)
8. American Splendor (2003)
7. In the Bedroom (2001)
6. Wonder Boys (2000)
5. Adaptation (2002)
4. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
3. Lost in Translation (2003)
2. Requiem for a Dream (2000)
1. City of God (2002)

Nothing left to do but laugh...

Comedies

It takes a lot for me to find a movie funny. Usually it’s not a comedy that does the trick, just funny moments in otherwise non-comedic films. Most comedies either try too hard or are aimed at 12-year-old boys…or both. In fact, there’s a couple of movies on this list that I didn’t even find all that funny the first time I saw them. Maybe I expect too much from comedies because I want a laugh in every scene. I guess it's the Airplane! effect. These movies are the ones that made me laugh out loud the most:

5. Saved! (2004) - "Us Christian girls have got to learn to protect ourselves. I mean, sure Jesus could restore my physical and spiritual virginity, especially if I lost it to some rapist, but who wants that? I’m saving myself for marriage and I’ll use force if necessary."

4. School of Rock (2003) – “Dude, I service society by rocking, OK? I'm out there on the front lines liberating people with my music!”

3. Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004) – “I’m in a glass case of emotion!!!”

2. O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000) – “Oh, George, not the livestock.”

1. Best in Show (2000) – “And to think that in some countries these dogs are eaten.”

I'll show them to you and you'll see them shine...

Underappreciated Films

These movies might not be the best of the best, but they either got overlooked by a lot of people or underappreciated by people who write about movies. I’d definitely recommend the following:

5. Animal Factory (2000) – This is Steve Buscemi’s second full-length film as director and although his first, Trees Lounge, is better, I really liked Animal Factory. He’d get points on this one just for having Mickey Rourke in drag and not playing it for laughs.

4. The Deep End (2001) – If you like Hitchcock movies you have to see this one. Also, Tilda Swinton is great. I’ve yet to see her in something bad, but I haven’t seen Constantine though.

3. The Salton Sea (2002) – Give this one a chance. It can seem pretentious and showy, but it’s worth it. After seeing this movie I expected big things from the director. He then went on to do Taking Lives. They can’t all be winners.

2. Open Range (2003) – Kevin Costner gets a bad rap for reasons I’ll never understand. It’s like you can’t make back-to-back post-apocalyptic films where you play strange heroes in bizarrely contrived futuristic situations. Sheesh! Give him a break…especially on this movie. See it. It’s really good.

1. Shattered Glass (2003) – It’s probably bad form to bad mouth someone while trying to talk up another, but who cares? If you are too blind to see the bad acting in the Star Wars prequels, then watch Hayden Christensen in this movie. The guy completely develops the character and makes you feel bad for him despite his unethical decisions. It’s a really great performance. It’s as if the guy directing Christensen in the Star Wars movies didn’t know how to deal with actors…or something like that.

The film was a bust but we stayed 'til the ending...

Really Bad Movies

I’ve already confessed to watching crappy movies despite knowing they’ll be crap. Sometimes I watch movies thinking they might have some redeeming qualities even if they aren’t Citizen Kane. Not everything has to be thought-provoking. I do like them to have some thought behind them though. Here are five movies from the 2000s that were so bad they really do make you wish you had your time back. Also, they don’t deserve comments:

5. Alex & Emma (2003)

4. Reindeer Games (2000)

3. Dr. Seuss’ The Cat in the Hat (2003)

2. Pearl Harbor (2001)

1. Charlie’s Angels (2000)